Rest in Peace

It's all over.

The years of waiting for this moment have not been in vain.

It was excellent.

It's just that I have this feeling of everything being over.

Where do we go now from here?

We don't have that feeling of looking forward to the next one that we are used to.

I won't ruin anything but suffice it to say, I am still in shock over a few things. Still in confusion over others. And still is pain and grief over the rest.

Almost from the beginning I have been steadily weeping. And by the end I was openly sobbing. But it was worth it. It has all been worth it.

Thank you for sharing with us a piece of your mind, imagination, and the world of wonders that we all want to be a part of.

More importantly, thank you for letting us be a part of the ride.

And boy, what a ride it was.

Currently Reading Mugglenet.Com's What Will Happen in Harry Potter 7: Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Falls in Love and How Will the Adventure Finally End By Ben Schoen, Emerson Spartz, Andy Gordon, Gretchen Stull, Jamie Lawrence see related

Well school started again. It's spring quarter which means I have just 10 more weeks until the end of school!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank God for small favors. just 10 more weeks of dealing with class and roommate and issues.

I'm coming home this weekend for Easter. I get to drive home tomorrow (ugh) but I don't care. I just hope that I don't get stuck in LA traffic. that wouldn't be fun.

my classes are interesting even if the professors really aren't. right now I'm in my music class. Its study of African music and it should be interesting but the professor is rather boring. My MMW prof is pretty cool and that should be an interesting class. We are going to be going so damn fast; we have to cover about 1300 years worth of history in about 10 weeks time. crazy man. I zoned out completely in my archaeology class. the teacher is so monotone and dry. I swear I will try to stay awake.

I went on a shopping spree last week when I went to Fresno to see people. I bought like 5 movies and a season of Mork & Mindy. It is such a funny show. Its where Robin Williams first got his start. I love watching it with my mom; we die laughing.

I also got Chocolat and Love Actually. I love those movies. they reaffirm my belief in love and gentlemenly guys. Chocolat also makes me really hungry for chocolate afterward too.

I got new pointe shoes. they are grishkos(its a russian brand) and I danced for a little while in them yesterday and they are so nice. I love them. the shank is already molded so I don't have to do that by hand.

its horrible. i thought i was going to resurrect xanga to just talk about my everyday life down here but i think its going to be more for me to just complain and ruminate on how changed everything is.

found out that daniela and kenny, the one couple that i thought was going to stay together forever, is breaking up. and that she got kicked out of chamber singers with no explaination. now she has no music classes and has no clue what her major is.

everyone here is trying to transfer out and/or change majors. all of my high school friends are trying to transfer out of their respective colleges.

it just feels so weird because i am actually doing what i thought i was going to do and i have no plans to change. am i just too set in my life? have i stuck myself purposely in a rut?

and i think i am now just admiting to myself something that i have come to a conclusion about(and if you understood that statement i give you major props). i know now that i cannot rely on anyone anymore. the time for that feeling of security has passed and now i can no longer afford that luxury. because when you allow yourself to rely on someone else all that ends up happening to you is heartache and pain when you are forced to separate. its not fair to purposely put yourself and the other person through something like that. i'm stronger alone and not having to depend on others.

Currently Listening Daybreaker By Beth Orton Thinking about Tomorrow see related

i think i am resurrecting xanga, at least for me. i don't know.

i'm still feeling horrible. i think i ended up getting stomach flu instead of food poisoning. i am so weak and i sleep so often. its really bad especially considering i have a midterm on friday and i don't feel ready for it. but you know what, i don't care anymore. thats horrible i know. but to steal a phrase from Anika, "i'm so over this."

i'm so looking forward to this weekend. i'm going to see my mom and dad and a special surprise, my brother. its going to be so much fun and whats even better i get away from the horrible food here and i get away from one of my roommates.

i can't stand here. i really just don't like her. her habits are so horrible. she is so incredibly messy; in a room meant only for 2 girls living with an extra makes it even harder. and with the way she leaves her stuff everywhere it makes it even worse. and what makes it even far worse, is that she doesn't take a shower except for like every 4 days. even when she comes back from the gym. it is so nasty. and there is some perfume that she wears and it smells so horrible. it permeates through the room and makes me feel sick. thank God that i will have my own room next year and i won't share an apartment with her. i don't think i could stand it. it would drive me up the wall even more. i am so looking forward to the end of this year. i will be at home for nearly 3 months and that will make me feel so good.

and Harry Potter is coming out in July. both the book and the movie. movie is july 13 and the book is the 21st. that is going to be a very interesting few weeks.

well i think i know why i have resurrected xanga; in order to complain. i am sorry for all those who read this.

Currently Listening Eric Whitacre: Cloudburst and other choral works By Eric Whitacre, Polyphony, Robert Millett, Stephen Betteridge, Stephen Layton Sleep see related

food poisoning is not fun

so i came down with food poisoning yesterday. i still don't know what really caused it but my suitemates and i think it was the salad that i bought from Ralphs. So if you are thinking about trying the Ready-Pac salads, don't do it.

i still don't feel great but i feel a hell of a lot better than what i did yesterday. dry heaving is not exactly fun. my stomach still feels really weak. my roommate is eating these awful vegetable chips and its making me sick. its really weird; i feel like a pregnent woman and how different smells make her feel sick. i hate this.

so other than my ranting and raving about food sickness, thats pretty much what i've been up to. i can't believe its already week 5. thank God. the quarter is almost over and then i just have 1 quarter left before summer.